Fixies

FoundationStepper · Post by **FoundationStepper** » Sun Oct 11, 2009 11:09 pm

.. Have multiplied across melbourne.

Opinions seem divided.

What do you think?

:donk:

mecka · Post by **mecka** » Sun Oct 11, 2009 11:16 pm

hipster douchebag fad imo

kronz · Post by **kronz** » Sun Oct 11, 2009 11:36 pm

Uber mega stupid idea. Mmm bikes with no breaks, wanker trend IMO.

Hardy · Post by **Hardy** » Mon Oct 12, 2009 12:08 am

Gayest thing since gay came to gaytown.

aroes · Post by **aroes** » Mon Oct 12, 2009 12:16 am

good for a quick commute, and i dig the whole minimalism ethos

that said though, i reckon most people just have em for wank value. if you wanna ride more than 5km and/or up a hill, they are impractical as fuck

would not

Post by **fooishbar** » Mon Oct 12, 2009 12:30 am

nic loves em. think i saw him on http://latfh.com hactually.

nic · Post by **nic** » Mon Oct 12, 2009 9:33 am

gheylorsd imo

foo hired one tyo ride thru shordoitch pon yelling blodclart etc

LOL

nah fuckn hate the cunts
(realy good fucn too ride however, i hvae neo)

Post by **system** » Mon Oct 12, 2009 9:44 am

Post by **fooishbar** » Mon Oct 12, 2009 9:53 am

nic wrote:i hvae neo

deviant · Post by **deviant** » Mon Oct 12, 2009 11:20 am

couldn't care less....

I llike the minimal look though I guess

andy_hoffman · Post by **andy_hoffman** » Mon Oct 12, 2009 11:25 am

Wank tbh.

Direkt · Post by **Direkt** » Mon Oct 12, 2009 12:19 pm

Hardy wrote:Gayest thing since gay came to gaytown.

lol and

mrj · Post by **mrj** » Mon Oct 12, 2009 12:27 pm

I've always been a cycling enthusiast so I can't help but like nice bikes.

and a lot of the customised bizzo's that are going around a quite simply beautiful bikes.
+ I think the simplicity of single speed is great, especially after years of mashinng derailuers in the city.

having the fixed wheel aspect is a problem. fixed wheel in the city can be very dangerous, it's sorta ok for experienced riders who have the strength to control them but in the wrong hands they are hazards.

all in all i don't have a problem with the bikes, but yeh like any fad its been victimsed by its own success.

FoundationStepper · Post by **FoundationStepper** » Mon Oct 12, 2009 12:27 pm

Best spots for fixie spotting:
- Brunswick St
- 7 Seeds cafe
- Brother Baba Budan

Others?

mrj · Post by **mrj** » Mon Oct 12, 2009 12:33 pm

Gertrude St
Smith St

youthful_implants · Post by **youthful_implants** » Mon Oct 12, 2009 12:36 pm

massively gay.

Blaxter · Post by **Blaxter** » Mon Oct 12, 2009 1:01 pm

FoundationStepper wrote:Best spots for fixie spotting:
- Brunswick St
- 7 Seeds cafe
- Brother Baba Budan

Others?

You seem to be angling towards a fixie owner bashing.. Got a van and balaclava?

C.I.A. · Post by **C.I.A.** » Mon Oct 12, 2009 5:52 pm

Take a stroll down the street in any major North American or European city and you'll be sure to see a speckle of fashion-conscious twentysomethings hanging about and sporting a number of predictable stylistic trademarks: skinny jeans, cotton spandex leggings, fixed-gear bikes, vintage flannel, fake eyeglasses and a keffiyeh – initially sported by Jewish students and Western protesters to express solidarity with Palestinians, the keffiyeh has become a completely meaningless hipster cliché fashion accessory.

The American Apparel V-neck shirt, Pabst Blue Ribbon beer and Parliament cigarettes are symbols and icons of working or revolutionary classes that have been appropriated by hipsterdom and drained of meaning. Ten years ago, a man wearing a plain V-neck tee and drinking a Pabst would never be accused of being a trend-follower. But in 2008, such things have become shameless clichés of a class of individuals that seek to escape their own wealth and privilege by immersing themselves in the aesthetic of the working class.

This obsession with "street-cred" reaches its apex of absurdity as hipsters have recently and wholeheartedly adopted the fixed-gear bike as the only acceptable form of transportation.

Lovers of apathy and irony, hipsters are connected through a global network of blogs and shops that push forth a global vision of fashion-informed aesthetics. Loosely associated with some form of creative output, they attend art parties, take lo-fi pictures with analog cameras, ride their bikes to night clubs and sweat it up at nouveau disco-coke parties. The hipster tends to religiously blog about their daily exploits, usually while leafing through generation-defining magazines like Vice, Another Magazine and Wallpaper. This cursory and stylized lifestyle has made the hipster almost universally loathed.

"These hipster zombies… are the idols of the style pages, the darlings of viral marketers and the marks of predatory real-estate agents," wrote Christian Lorentzen in a Time Out New York article entitled ‘Why the Hipster Must Die.' "And they must be buried for cool to be reborn."

With nothing to defend, uphold or even embrace, the idea of "hipsterdom" is left wide open for attack. And yet, it is this ironic lack of authenticity that has allowed hipsterdom to grow into a global phenomenon that is set to consume the very core of Western counterculture. Most critics make a point of attacking the hipster's lack of individuality, but it is this stubborn obfuscation that distinguishes them from their predecessors, while allowing hipsterdom to easily blend in and mutate other social movements, sub-cultures and lifestyles.

***

Standing outside an art-party next to a neat row of locked-up fixed-gear bikes, I come across a couple girls who exemplify hipster homogeneity. I ask one of the girls if her being at an art party and wearing fake eyeglasses, leggings and a flannel shirt makes her a hipster.

"I'm not comfortable with that term," she replies.

Her friend adds, with just a flicker of menace in her eyes, "Yeah, I don't know, you shouldn't use that word, it's just…"

"Offensive?"

"No… it's just, well… if you don't know why then you just shouldn't even use it."

"Ok, so what are you girls doing tonight after this party?"

"Ummm… We're going to the after-party."

***

Gavin McInnes, one of the founders of Vice, who recently left the magazine, is considered to be one of hipsterdom's primary architects. But, in contrast to the majority of concerned media-types, McInnes, whose "Dos and Don'ts" commentary defined the rules of hipster fashion for over a decade, is more critical of those doing the criticizing.

"I've always found that word ["hipster"] is used with such disdain, like it's always used by chubby bloggers who aren't getting laid anymore and are bored, and they're just so mad at these young kids for going out and getting wasted and having fun and being fashionable," he says. "I'm dubious of these hypotheses because they always smell of an agenda."

Punks wear their tattered threads and studded leather jackets with honor, priding themselves on their innovative and cheap methods of self-expression and rebellion. B-boys and b-girls announce themselves to anyone within earshot with baggy gear and boomboxes. But it is rare, if not impossible, to find an individual who will proclaim themself a proud hipster. It's an odd dance of self-identity – adamantly denying your existence while wearing clearly defined symbols that proclaims it.

***

"He's 17 and he lives for the scene!" a girl whispers in my ear as I sneak a photo of a young kid dancing up against a wall in a dimly lit corner of the after-party. He's got a flipped-out, do-it-yourself haircut, skin-tight jeans, leather jacket, a vintage punk tee and some popping high tops.

"Shoot me," he demands, walking up, cigarette in mouth, striking a pose and exhaling. He hits a few different angles with a firmly unimpressed expression and then gets a bit giddy when I show him the results.

"Rad, thanks," he says, re-focusing on the music and submerging himself back into the sweaty funk of the crowd where he resumes a jittery head bobble with a little bit of a twitch.

The dance floor at a hipster party looks like it should be surrounded by quotation marks. While punk, disco and hip hop all had immersive, intimate and energetic dance styles that liberated the dancer from his/her mental states – be it the head-spinning b-boy or violent thrashings of a live punk show – the hipster has more of a joke dance. A faux shrug shuffle that mocks the very idea of dancing or, at its best, illustrates a non-committal fear of expression typified in a weird twitch/ironic twist. The dancers are too self-aware to let themselves feel any form of liberation; they shuffle along, shrugging themselves into oblivion.

Perhaps the true motivation behind this deliberate nonchalance is an attempt to attract the attention of the ever-present party photographers, who swim through the crowd like neon sharks, flashing little blasts of phosphorescent ecstasy whenever they spot someone worth momentarily immortalizing.

Noticing a few flickers of light splash out from the club bathroom, I peep in only to find one such photographer taking part in an impromptu soft-core porno shoot. Two girls and a guy are taking off their clothes and striking poses for a set of grimy glamour shots. It's all grins and smirks until another girl pokes her head inside and screeches, "You're not some club kid in New York in the nineties. This shit is so hipster!" – which sparks a bit of a catfight, causing me to beat a hasty retreat.

In many ways, the lifestyle promoted by hipsterdom is highly ritualized. Many of the party-goers who are subject to the photoblogger's snapshots no doubt crawl out of bed the next afternoon and immediately re-experience the previous night's debauchery. Red-eyed and bleary, they sit hunched over their laptops, wading through a sea of similarity to find their own (momentarily) thrilling instant of perfected hipster-ness.

What they may or may not know is that "cool-hunters" will also be skulking the same sites, taking note of how they dress and what they consume. These marketers and party-promoters get paid to co-opt youth culture and then re-sell it back at a profit. In the end, hipsters are sold what they think they invent and are spoon-fed their pre-packaged cultural livelihood.

Hipsterdom is the first "counterculture" to be born under the advertising industry's microscope, leaving it open to constant manipulation but also forcing its participants to continually shift their interests and affiliations. Less a subculture, the hipster is a consumer group – using their capital to purchase empty authenticity and rebellion. But the moment a trend, band, sound, style or feeling gains too much exposure, it is suddenly looked upon with disdain. Hipsters cannot afford to maintain any cultural loyalties or affiliations for fear they will lose relevance.

An amalgamation of its own history, the youth of the West are left with consuming cool rather that creating it. The cultural zeitgeists of the past have always been sparked by furious indignation and are reactionary movements. But the hipster's self-involved and isolated maintenance does nothing to feed cultural evolution. Western civilization's well has run dry. The only way to avoid hitting the colossus of societal failure that looms over the horizon is for the kids to abandon this vain existence and start over.

***

"If you don't give a damn, we don't give a fuck!" chants an emcee before his incitements are abruptly cut short when the power plug is pulled and the lights snapped on.

Dawn breaks and the last of the after-after-parties begin to spill into the streets. The hipsters are falling out, rubbing their eyes and scanning the surrounding landscape for the way back from which they came. Some hop on their fixed-gear bikes, some call for cabs, while a few of us hop a fence and cut through the industrial wasteland of a nearby condo development.

The half-built condos tower above us like foreboding monoliths of our yuppie futures. I take a look at one of the girls wearing a bright pink keffiyah and carrying a Polaroid camera and think, "If only we carried rocks instead of cameras, we'd look like revolutionaries." But instead we ignore the weapons that lie at our feet – oblivious to our own impending demise.

We are a lost generation, desperately clinging to anything that feels real, but too afraid to become it ourselves. We are a defeated generation, resigned to the hypocrisy of those before us, who once sang songs of rebellion and now sell them back to us. We are the last generation, a culmination of all previous things, destroyed by the vapidity that surrounds us. The hipster represents the end of Western civilization – a culture so detached and disconnected that it has stopped giving birth to anything new.

C.I.A. · Post by **C.I.A.** » Mon Oct 12, 2009 5:59 pm

FoundationStepper wrote:Best spots for fixie spotting:
- Brunswick St
- 7 Seeds cafe
- Brother Baba Budan

Others?

Flinders Lane (esp. outside cumulus and journal).

C.I.A. · Post by **C.I.A.** » Mon Oct 12, 2009 6:04 pm

http://www.hipsterrunoff.com/?s=fixie

Nuff said.

Post by **fooishbar** » Mon Oct 12, 2009 6:35 pm

once saw someone riding a lime-green fixie with an apple sticker on the stem. if i wasn't in shock, i would've punched them off their bike.

mecka · Post by **mecka** » Mon Oct 12, 2009 6:55 pm

FoundationStepper wrote:Best spots for fixie spotting:
- Brunswick St
- 7 Seeds cafe
- Brother Baba Budan

Others?

the end of my crowbar tbh

spazz · Post by **spazz** » Mon Oct 12, 2009 6:57 pm

Nice one CIA...interesting read. Not sure however whether the author feels he stands on the outside looking in or in fact feels that he is being sucked into the void of hipsterdom. Kinda standing on the event horizon if you will.

Oh yeah, fixies.........if thats what you want fine. I love bikes but am happy with my gears. Not for me. But

At least people are riding bikes which really is only a good thing.

Shit I can think of a fuck load worse hipster/trend fashions that piss me off more. Like farkin tight black jeans with boxers sticking out and slipper like shoes. This equals a punch in the face in my book.

Hardy didnt you just come out of the closet recently??

Hardy · Post by **Hardy** » Mon Oct 12, 2009 7:04 pm

spazz wrote:
Hardy didnt you just come out of the closet recently??

Yep. Wasn't enough room for the both of us in there.

Hardy · Post by **Hardy** » Mon Oct 12, 2009 7:05 pm

fooishbar wrote:once saw someone riding a lime-green fixie with an apple sticker on the stem. if i wasn't in shock, i would've punched them off their bike.

JESUS FUCKING CHRIST!!!! I can picture, and it looks like sadness.

Blaxter · Post by **Blaxter** » Tue Oct 13, 2009 8:56 am

Hardy wrote:
spazz wrote:
Hardy didnt you just come out of the closet recently??
Yep. Wasn't enough room for the both of us in there.

Need to get a bigger closet to be real hipster.

mrj · Post by **mrj** » Tue Oct 13, 2009 9:13 am

spazz wrote:At least people are riding bikes which really is only a good thing.

this is an extremley valid point

all trends are annoying, but at least this one comes without car fumes.

C.I.A. · Post by **C.I.A.** » Tue Oct 13, 2009 12:00 pm

Looks like we've got a new collective noun:

A fixie of hipsters.

FoundationStepper · Post by **FoundationStepper** » Tue Oct 13, 2009 12:07 pm

Last 2 times I saw no brakes fixies they were running red lights in the cbd and barely missing a flock of pedestrians. that sort of riding doesn't do other bike riders' reputation much favours

Blaxter · Post by **Blaxter** » Tue Oct 13, 2009 12:55 pm

FoundationStepper wrote:Last 2 times I saw no brakes fixies they were running red lights in the cbd and barely missing a flock of pedestrians. that sort of riding doesn't do other bike riders' reputation much favours

I experienced pedestrian rage a few weeks ago an nearly knocked a chick off her bike for doing that. Felt a bit bad as I walked off, should of punched the carry bag over the back wheel harder.

spazz · Post by **spazz** » Tue Oct 13, 2009 1:46 pm

Hardy wrote:
spazz wrote:
Hardy didnt you just come out of the closet recently??
Yep. Wasn't enough room for the both of us in there.

I was the Lion and you were the Witch right???

But your right beggars can't be choosers.

Post by **huge** » Tue Oct 13, 2009 6:08 pm

you're not your jason. deary me.

Polecat · Post by **Polecat** » Tue Oct 13, 2009 10:33 pm

C.I.A. wrote:
FoundationStepper wrote:Best spots for fixie spotting:
- Brunswick St
- 7 Seeds cafe
- Brother Baba Budan

Others?
Flinders Lane (esp. outside cumulus and journal).

Outside Mess Hall on Bourke St.

Hardy · Post by **Hardy** » Tue Oct 13, 2009 10:37 pm

Wait... people are taking the BRAKES off their bikes now? WHAT THE FUCKING FUCK!?!
How fucking mnml man! Why don't they take the seat off it? And get rid of the wheels? FUCK IT! GID RID OF THE WHOLE BIKE! I'M MINIMAL AS FUCK!!!!

Polecat · Post by **Polecat** » Tue Oct 13, 2009 10:39 pm

If they're riding an old track bike Hardy they don't come with brakes.
The BF has a track bike. It's gorgeous for its streamlined nature, but he'd never ride it down to the velodrome because its GOT NO BRAKES.

Amick · Post by **Amick** » Tue Oct 13, 2009 11:24 pm

Hardy wrote:Wait... people are taking the BRAKES off their bikes now? WHAT THE FUCKING FUCK!?!
How fucking mnml man! Why don't they take the seat off it? And get rid of the wheels? FUCK IT! GID RID OF THE WHOLE BIKE! I'M MINIMAL AS FUCK!!!!

34 posts in and you just figured it out. Welcome to the thread!

Hardy · Post by **Hardy** » Tue Oct 13, 2009 11:37 pm

Amick wrote:
Hardy wrote:Wait... people are taking the BRAKES off their bikes now? WHAT THE FUCKING FUCK!?!
How fucking mnml man! Why don't they take the seat off it? And get rid of the wheels? FUCK IT! GID RID OF THE WHOLE BIKE! I'M MINIMAL AS FUCK!!!!
34 posts in and you just figured it out. Welcome to the thread!

You sir, are unpleasant and have buffoonesque qualities

Amick · Post by **Amick** » Tue Oct 13, 2009 11:49 pm

Hardy wrote:
Amick wrote:
Hardy wrote:Wait... people are taking the BRAKES off their bikes now? WHAT THE FUCKING FUCK!?!
How fucking mnml man! Why don't they take the seat off it? And get rid of the wheels? FUCK IT! GID RID OF THE WHOLE BIKE! I'M MINIMAL AS FUCK!!!!
34 posts in and you just figured it out. Welcome to the thread!
You sir, are unpleasant and have buffoonesque qualities

FoundationStepper · Post by **FoundationStepper** » Wed Oct 14, 2009 12:03 am

Wanky article on wanky coffee references fixies twice
http://www.theage.com.au/news/entertain ... ntentSwap1

More than a trend, the third wave is something of a subculture led by coffee geeks whose natty dress sense and penchant for tattoos and fixed-gear bicycles has led some second-wavers to dismiss them as a bunch of pretentious twats. Malatesta likes to think of himself as having a foot in both camps - having started his career in the second wave, he refers to himself as a ''cuspian''. ''I have a heavy respect for different genres. The second-wave guys, some of them did some really good work and paved the way for third-wave guys.''

Hardy · Post by **Hardy** » Wed Oct 14, 2009 12:09 am

FoundationStepper wrote:
More than a trend, the third wave is something of a subculture led by coffee geeks whose natty dress sense and penchant for tattoos and fixed-gear bicycles has led some second-wavers to dismiss them as a bunch of pretentious twats. Malatesta likes to think of himself as having a foot in both camps - having started his career in the second wave, he refers to himself as a ''cuspian''. ''I have a heavy respect for different genres. The second-wave guys, some of them did some really good work and paved the way for third-wave guys.''

It's stuff like this that make me want to buy a gun and blow my brains out of my head.

Amick · Post by **Amick** » Wed Oct 14, 2009 12:13 am

Hahaha FS that's just too much.

Agree with you there Tom, gotta laugh or cry or kill yourself.

Direkt · Post by **Direkt** » Wed Oct 14, 2009 8:39 am

It's not exactly that fixies don't have a braking system... it's just that the braking system is in stopping the fixed wheel through the pedals... surely you remember these bikes Hardy? Pretty sure I had an old BMX as a youngun that was fixed.

I love racing bikes myself, I raced competitively for a good 5 or so years - but track bikes belong on the track, pure and simple. This whole "minimal" argument is ridiculous IMO, road bikes have gears and hand brakes for a good reason.

Post by **system** » Wed Oct 14, 2009 10:18 am

C.I.A. wrote:Looks like we've got a new collective noun:

A fixie of hipsters.

superb!

yoink.

Hardy · Post by **Hardy** » Wed Oct 14, 2009 12:22 pm

Direkt wrote:It's not exactly that fixies don't have a braking system... it's just that the braking system is in stopping the fixed wheel through the pedals... surely you remember these bikes Hardy? Pretty sure I had an old BMX as a youngun that was fixed.

That's different then. When I was a kid, I found it damn near impossible to go from pedal brakes to handbrakes. But then again, I was a pretty dumb kid.

Blaxter · Post by **Blaxter** » Wed Oct 14, 2009 12:49 pm

Back brakes for the win. Where you pedal backwards hard and then stop.

andy_hoffman · Post by **andy_hoffman** » Wed Oct 14, 2009 4:13 pm

Blaxter wrote:Back brakes for the win. Where you pedal backwards hard and then stop.

When i was little they were cool for goin fast and then doin a big skid in front of your mates and stopping with ur foot on the ground and posing slightly lol...

... well i thought it was cool anyway.

Amick · Post by **Amick** » Wed Oct 14, 2009 4:16 pm

Probably didn't help it was your sister's bike. Pink streamers, basket etc.

andy_hoffman · Post by **andy_hoffman** » Wed Oct 14, 2009 4:25 pm

Was actually a really old GT i think. Tuffs and no freewheel. Think they were fake skyways too. Blue tyres worn down to the wire. Loved that bike!

youthful_implants · Post by **youthful_implants** » Thu Oct 15, 2009 10:24 am

What also makes me laugh, even more than the skinny jean, fixie riding bellends are the the cycling 'pros' you see all around melbourne on razor thin bikes with full cycling clothing and regalia looking gay as aids.

They're usually over 55 in first gear going backwards up a hill and sweating profusely. Its not cool haha

Blaxter · Post by **Blaxter** » Thu Oct 15, 2009 1:02 pm

Replica racing bike pants and tight tops should be outlawed.... unless you have a closet like the Tardis and can fit your bike in their as well as youself.

Fixies - best thing since spokie dokes or tosser material?