Funniest ... ever!!!flippo wrote:anyone recon homer is the funnist fictional character ever made? I'm tpying with the idea...
Simpsons Quote Thread
yes I was desciding if i could be bothered mentioning him in my intial post.jbs wrote:David Brent.quick wrote:Funniest ... ever!!!flippo wrote:anyone recon homer is the funnist fictional character ever made? I'm tpying with the idea...
Do you think David Brent would have the staying power that homer has tho?
David Brent is more lifelike which I think makes it funnier.flippo wrote:yes I was desciding if i could be bothered mentioning him in my intial post.jbs wrote:David Brent.quick wrote: Funniest ... ever!!!
Do you think David Brent would have the staying power that homer has tho?
Don't hate me for house
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system
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admitting that you have a problem is the first step towards a cure. brave and bold move. much love.quick wrote:Yes, by highlighting possible symptoms of an illness, which I may or may not have... really funnysystem wrote:dude, chill out. I'm not making fun of syndromes and disorders.quick wrote:what ever
I'm making fun of you!
DRS wrote:It’s uplifting while we drift through time,
‘cause we keep pushing the vibe.
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system
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lynt wrote::looksatthreadtitle:
Skinner: And turning to the 3-D map, we see an unmistakable cone of ignorance.
[produces a model that looks like a black-hole map, with schooldesks stuck to it. The center of the "hole" is where Bart's seat would normally be]
Marge: [flinching] Put it away! Put it away!
Skinner: Very well, but there's no escaping the truth. Bart has a classic case of attention deficit disorder.
Marge: You mean like John Leguizamo?
Skinner: How should I know? The point is, ADD makes children restless and easily distracted.
Homer: [uses the model as a megaphone] Hi Marge, it's me, Homer.
[Skinner clears his throat] What? Time to go?
Skinner: Please, Mr. Simpson. I'm afraid I'll have to expel your son, [Marge gasps] unless you're willing to try a radical, untested, potentially dangerous ...
Homer: Candy bar?
Skinner: No. It's a new drug, called Focusyn.
Marge: A drug? I know Bart can be rambunctious, but he's not some hyperactive monster.
[suddenly Bart appears in the window, dressed in cheerleader garb]
Bart: Gimme an "F!" Gimme an "art!"
Skinner: Good Lord! He's gotten into the pep closet.
Homer: I'd say he's coming out of the pep closet. [chuckles]
DRS wrote:It’s uplifting while we drift through time,
‘cause we keep pushing the vibe.
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SoulWhiteMan
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system
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Lurleen: Homer, no man has ever been this nice to me without... you know... wantin' sum'in' in return.
Homer: Well, now, I was going to ask you for a glass of water, but now I feel kinda guilty about it.
Lurleen: [chuckles] Oh Homer, you're just a big sack of sugar.
Homer: Hey! [thinks on it] You <did> say sugar, right?
Lurleen: Homer, I want you to be my manager.
Homer: Really?! Well, I should warn you, I'm not great with figures.
Lurleen: That's okay.
Homer: I make a lot of stupid decisions.
Lurleen: Nobody's perfect.
Homer: I did bad in school.
Lurleen: I didn't even go.
Homer: My personal hygeine has been described as...
Homer: Well, now, I was going to ask you for a glass of water, but now I feel kinda guilty about it.
Lurleen: [chuckles] Oh Homer, you're just a big sack of sugar.
Homer: Hey! [thinks on it] You <did> say sugar, right?
Lurleen: Homer, I want you to be my manager.
Homer: Really?! Well, I should warn you, I'm not great with figures.
Lurleen: That's okay.
Homer: I make a lot of stupid decisions.
Lurleen: Nobody's perfect.
Homer: I did bad in school.
Lurleen: I didn't even go.
Homer: My personal hygeine has been described as...
DRS wrote:It’s uplifting while we drift through time,
‘cause we keep pushing the vibe.
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SoulWhiteMan
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Ag3nT[]0raNg3
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when the weight of the world has got you down
and you want to end your life
bills to pay
dead end job
troubles with the wife
Well dont throw in the towel
cause theres a place right down the block
where you can drink your misery away
at flaming moes (lets all go to flaming)
liquor in a mug
will warm you like a hug
happiness is just a flaming moe away
happiness is just a flaming moe away
will warm you like a hug =
and you want to end your life
bills to pay
dead end job
troubles with the wife
Well dont throw in the towel
cause theres a place right down the block
where you can drink your misery away
at flaming moes (lets all go to flaming)
liquor in a mug
will warm you like a hug
happiness is just a flaming moe away
happiness is just a flaming moe away
will warm you like a hug =
He's climbing in your windows, he's snatching your people up.
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system
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Dr. Nick: So, what are we doing? A lengthening, or a widening?
Cap'n: Yar, er, let's make it both.
[the flaming wheel flies into the office through an open window, and lands on a canister of ether as if it were peg in a ring-toss game]
Cap'n: Yar!
Dr. Nick: Don't worry; it's inflammable.
["inflammable" means "flammable" -- the canister and the office quickly ignite]
Dr. Nick: Let's keep this our little secret.
Cap'n: Yar, er, let's make it both.
[the flaming wheel flies into the office through an open window, and lands on a canister of ether as if it were peg in a ring-toss game]
Cap'n: Yar!
Dr. Nick: Don't worry; it's inflammable.
["inflammable" means "flammable" -- the canister and the office quickly ignite]
Dr. Nick: Let's keep this our little secret.
DRS wrote:It’s uplifting while we drift through time,
‘cause we keep pushing the vibe.
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Ag3nT[]0raNg3
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Ag3nT[]0raNg3
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Louie: They's throwing robots!
Linguo: They are throwing robots.
Legs: He's disrespecting us. Shuttupa you face!
Linguo: Shut up your face!
Legs: Wassamatta you?
Louie: You aint so big.
Legs: Me and him are gonna whack you in the Labonza!
Linguo: Bad... grammar... overload. Error! Error!
Homer: What the hell!? :gasp: Linguo..... dead!?
Linguo: They are throwing robots.
Legs: He's disrespecting us. Shuttupa you face!
Linguo: Shut up your face!
Legs: Wassamatta you?
Louie: You aint so big.
Legs: Me and him are gonna whack you in the Labonza!
Linguo: Bad... grammar... overload. Error! Error!
Homer: What the hell!? :gasp: Linguo..... dead!?
Homer (To the tune of Doe, a deer, a female deer)
DOUGH... the stuff... that buys me beer...
RAY ..... the guy that sells me beer...
ME...... the guy...who drinks the beer,
FAR..... the distance to my beer.
SO...... I think I'll have a beer.
LA...... La, la la la la beer
TEA..... no thanks, I'm drinking beer...
That will bring us back to...
(Looks into an empty glass)
D'OH!
DOUGH... the stuff... that buys me beer...
RAY ..... the guy that sells me beer...
ME...... the guy...who drinks the beer,
FAR..... the distance to my beer.
SO...... I think I'll have a beer.
LA...... La, la la la la beer
TEA..... no thanks, I'm drinking beer...
That will bring us back to...
(Looks into an empty glass)
D'OH!
system wrote:"inflammable" means "flammable"
Sat 1st May: TREVOR LOVEYS (UK)
Sun 30th May: OXIA (8BIT RECS - FRANCE)
http://the-late-show.blogspot.com/
Sun 30th May: OXIA (8BIT RECS - FRANCE)
http://the-late-show.blogspot.com/
Stray wrote:Homer (To the tune of Doe, a deer, a female deer)
DOUGH... the stuff... that buys me beer...
RAY ..... the guy that sells me beer...
ME...... the guy...who drinks the beer,
FAR..... the distance to my beer.
SO...... I think I'll have a beer.
LA...... La, la la la la beer
TEA..... no thanks, I'm drinking beer...
That will bring us back to...
(Looks into an empty glass)
D'OH!
GOLD!!
...and basically that's the situation
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SoulWhiteMan
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Marge: I think we're going to need a bigger place.
Homer: No, we don't. I've got it all figured out. The baby can have Bart's room and Bart can sleep with us until he's 21.
Marge: Won't that warp him?
Homer: My cousin Frank did it.
Marge: You don't have a cousin Frank.
Homer: He became Francine in '76. Then he joined that cult. I think his name is Mother Shabubu now
Homer: No, we don't. I've got it all figured out. The baby can have Bart's room and Bart can sleep with us until he's 21.
Marge: Won't that warp him?
Homer: My cousin Frank did it.
Marge: You don't have a cousin Frank.
Homer: He became Francine in '76. Then he joined that cult. I think his name is Mother Shabubu now
I kissed a squirrel and I liked it... taste of her acorn chapstick
Homer: Kids, kids. I'm not going to die. That only happens to bad people.
Bart: What about Abraham Lincoln?
Homer: Uh, he sold poison milk to school children.
Homer: God, if you really are God, you'll get me tickets to that game.
[doorbell rings]
Ned Flanders: Heidely-ho, neighbor. Wanna go to the game with me? I got two tick--
Homer: [slams the door, looks heavenward] Why do you mock me, O Lord?
Marge: Homer, that's not God. That's just a waffle that Bart tossed up there.
[Marge scrapes it off the ceiling into Homer's hands]
Homer: I know I shouldn't eat thee, but -- [bites] Mmm, sacrilicious.
Kent Brockman: Springfield has come down with a fever: football fever. If you have the fever, there's only one cure. Take 2 tickets, and see the game Sunday morning.
Public Service Announcer: Warning. Tickets should NOT be taken internally.
Homer: See? Because of me, now they have a warning
Marge: I'm worried about the kids, Homey. Lisa's becoming very obsessive.
Homer: I know. And this perpetual-motion machine she made today is a joke! It just keeps going faster and faster. Lisa! Get in here. [Lisa walks in] In this house, we obey the laws of thermodynamics!
Homer: You mean you gave away both your dogs? You know how I feel about giving!
[Homer can't stop the monorail]
Marge: I've brought somebody to help you.
Homer: Is it Batman?
Marge: It's a scientist.
Homer: Batman's a scientist?
Marge: It's NOT Batman.
Homer: Ah, Andy Capp, you wife-beating drunk.
Homer: Bad bees! Get away from my sugar! Ow! Ow!! Oh, they're defending themselves somehow!
Homer: (Offering Lisa a donut.) Donut?
Lisa: Uhh... got any fruit?
Homer: This one has purple in it. Purple's a fruit.
Bart: What about Abraham Lincoln?
Homer: Uh, he sold poison milk to school children.
Homer: God, if you really are God, you'll get me tickets to that game.
[doorbell rings]
Ned Flanders: Heidely-ho, neighbor. Wanna go to the game with me? I got two tick--
Homer: [slams the door, looks heavenward] Why do you mock me, O Lord?
Marge: Homer, that's not God. That's just a waffle that Bart tossed up there.
[Marge scrapes it off the ceiling into Homer's hands]
Homer: I know I shouldn't eat thee, but -- [bites] Mmm, sacrilicious.
Kent Brockman: Springfield has come down with a fever: football fever. If you have the fever, there's only one cure. Take 2 tickets, and see the game Sunday morning.
Public Service Announcer: Warning. Tickets should NOT be taken internally.
Homer: See? Because of me, now they have a warning
Marge: I'm worried about the kids, Homey. Lisa's becoming very obsessive.
Homer: I know. And this perpetual-motion machine she made today is a joke! It just keeps going faster and faster. Lisa! Get in here. [Lisa walks in] In this house, we obey the laws of thermodynamics!
Homer: You mean you gave away both your dogs? You know how I feel about giving!
[Homer can't stop the monorail]
Marge: I've brought somebody to help you.
Homer: Is it Batman?
Marge: It's a scientist.
Homer: Batman's a scientist?
Marge: It's NOT Batman.
Homer: Ah, Andy Capp, you wife-beating drunk.
Homer: Bad bees! Get away from my sugar! Ow! Ow!! Oh, they're defending themselves somehow!
Homer: (Offering Lisa a donut.) Donut?
Lisa: Uhh... got any fruit?
Homer: This one has purple in it. Purple's a fruit.
I kissed a squirrel and I liked it... taste of her acorn chapstick
H ; Bblllldddaabda blldddllaablllada bdlla bdddlllaabaada. ( looks in mirror and scares himself, falls down stairs)mecka wrote:H: "no beer and no tv make homer go something something...|
M: "...go crazy?"
H: "don't mind if I do!"
Same episode ! (Best episode ever maybe )
H - Give me the bat, give me the bat, give me the bat bat bat bat ...
Homer: Marge, since I'm not talking to Lisa, could you please ask her to pass me the syrup?
Marge: Please pass your father the syrup, Lisa.
Lisa: Bart, tell dad I'll only pass the syrup if it won't be used on any meat products.
Bart: You dunkin your sausages in that syrup, Home boy?
Homer: Marge, tell Bart I just want to drink a nice glass of syrup like I do every morning.
Marge: Tell him yourself, you're ignoring Lisa, not Bart.
Homer: Bart thank your mother for pointing that out.
Marge: Homer, you're not not talking to me, and secondly, I heard what you said.
Homer: Lisa, tell your mother to get off my case.
Bart: Ah, dad, Lisa's the one you're not talking to,
Homer: Bart, go to your room!
Marge: Please pass your father the syrup, Lisa.
Lisa: Bart, tell dad I'll only pass the syrup if it won't be used on any meat products.
Bart: You dunkin your sausages in that syrup, Home boy?
Homer: Marge, tell Bart I just want to drink a nice glass of syrup like I do every morning.
Marge: Tell him yourself, you're ignoring Lisa, not Bart.
Homer: Bart thank your mother for pointing that out.
Marge: Homer, you're not not talking to me, and secondly, I heard what you said.
Homer: Lisa, tell your mother to get off my case.
Bart: Ah, dad, Lisa's the one you're not talking to,
Homer: Bart, go to your room!
I kissed a squirrel and I liked it... taste of her acorn chapstick
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Ag3nT[]0raNg3
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